An American Sampler

I meant this to be the first thing I posted when I started my blogging escapades so here it is my favourite poem it sums up my weltangshuung (world view). See I give translations.

Resume by Dorothy Parker

Razors pain you;

Rivers are damp;

Acid stains you;

And drugs cause cramp;

Guns aren't lawful;

Nooses give;

Gas smells awful;

You might as well live.